Be the person you wanna find; don't be a nickel out here lookin' for a dime.

Okay.
Lyfe was speaking some real ish on this one...
"I'ma teach you how to expose the 90%, and show you what to do to keep the other 10.
Number One: Don't be a booty call. If he don't respect you girl, he's gon' forget you girl.
Two: If he's in a relationship, and he will cheat on her that means he will cheat on you.
Three: Tell him that you're celibate, and if he wants some of your goodies he's gon' have to work for it.
Four: Be the person you wanna find; don't be a nickel out here lookin' for a dime.
STATISTICS!"
Hence the title of this post.
I, for one, needed to hear those good ole helpful hints.
Thanks LJ. I'll get you on the next round.
I need to hear a lot of other things too, but we'll start with this.
Number four was a particularly important one.
It seems that at times, I fail to realize some of the most obvious things ever.
And I'm not alone in doing this...many people succumb to the downfall that is obliviousness, especially pertaining to this subject.
However.
I tend to be oblivious to the fact that no one is perfect.
Naturally, I'm the first to jump and claim that I'm not perfect.
But from some of my comments, it is discernible that I expect everyone around me to be perfect, even though when I think about it, I know that's not a possibility.

Another issue that I have concerns the fact that I am extremely gullible.
I don't think it's a sign of being naive; rather a sign of trusting everyone to tell the truth.
To those of you who know me very well emotionally, it should come as no surprise that I have significant trust issues resulting from issues beyond my control.
This makes me wonder what on Earth has come over me to coerce me to believe (nearly) everything that I'm told.
Of course, there are exceptions; I don't believe EVERY thing I'm told.
For example: just the other day, I was told that the sky was lime green, and consisted of that slime stuff all of the 1990's kids remember so well.
I would have been a fool to regard such a preposterous proposition as being true.
But I find it to be a stark contradiction that I have trust issues (sometimes to the dismay of people whom, in reality, I should trust more than I do) with many individuals, yet can "let my guard down" when it comes to anyone else in the general world.
That's gotta change.

Additionally, I'm quite the potty mouth upon occasion.
I have been known to "swear as would a sailor" in the past.
It hadn't been an every day thing until recently; previously it was more of an anger or pain-induced coping mechanism.
But those days are behind me.
Although sometimes those sacred four-letter words make me feel better after I say them sometimes,
And although they give any "point" that I may wish to make an extra emphasis that is needed in some cases,
They have to be banished from my vocabulary.
It's gotta happen.
Or else, my kid is gonna pop out and instead of crying, he/she is going to look at me and say "you @#$!#$@*%, why didn't you let me out sooner?!?!?!?!? I'm gonna @#$%*!#@$%&*#@$%#@!$#$%&*$#$%!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

While we're on this note, I'd like to include that I make fun of/talk badly of far too many people on far too often of a basis.
It's like a bad habit that I can't seem to shake, no matter how hard I try.
I have spurts here and there where I am overly aware of who I'm speaking with, and I realize that said person would be a prime candidate to turn around and twist my comments up and get me in trouble in the long run.
And I wonder why people talk about me?
Gee, Karma has shown me before that she's a very feisty character...but apparently I didn't learn.

And finally, the last stop on your tour through this spastic and confusing mind (I can hear your screams and chants, so I'll make this quick).
I'm just gonna be blunt on this one: I love too hard.
And I worry too much.
About EVERY little thing.
I care too much about the small things and neglect the big things (partially caused by my obliviousness, see paragraph one).
That's terrible, and it's gotta end.


So, given today's date, I'm sure you could guess where this post was headed, correct?
Well if not, let me let you in on a little secret.
Psssst...New Year's Resolutions.
Yeah, those *I almost cussed...I'm working on it though...which leads me to my next point*.
For your information, I do realize that this is an extreme laundry list of items that I aspire to accomplish within a minuscule amount of time.
I mean, a year? What? Come again?
However, I can do it, and I will tell you why.
A.) I'm confident...for now anyway. For the first time in...ever...I believe in myself, and that's the most important thing when you think about it.
B.) I've come to realize that only a few things happen overnight, and none of the above goals are included on that list. That being said, I understand that this list will require time to complete, and it will be a gradual process getting there. I'm actually okay with being patient this time.
C.) I've been told that my drive is what motivates OTHER people to be the best that they can be, so why not let my own drive motivate my own goals and dreams? Exactly. There's no reason to. (and no, I did not mean my sex drive, thank you.)

All of that being said, I'd like to conclude by informing you that 2011 is the year that I'm opening a whole new chapter in my life. Yes, that's extremely cliche, but I do not care at this point. There are so many things that 2011 has in store for me, and I'm determined to make the best of them. Without the above changes, that's simply impossible.

My new favorite quote:
"The past is only a building block for the future."
Read it. Believe it. Live it. Love it.
Happy New Year.

M-I-A A-T-L fo sho.

Hey babes. I trust that all of you are doing well? I surely hope so. I am sincerely sorry that I haven't posted in almost 60 days, but if you knew how busy I had been...yeah. Lots of emotional turmoil. Anywho, I just wanted to check in with you all and inform you that I miss you something terribly. It's depressing, actually. I have SO much to share with you all from the past months and I can't wait to do so, but currently that's a goal that's slightly unattainable as I am posting through my mobile phone only. Regardless, I shall return, loverlies. I. Shall. Return. Have a blessed day :)